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Flirting – Am I compensating?

July 30, 2011

I would like to begin this post with the obvious, I am a flirt! Completely and totally, and I admit it, and I’m sure Bear remembers all to clearly the first time I seduced him to bed with words first.

So at the HD, there are a lot of middle-aged men, as well we younger guys in their early 20s. I noticed a couple of days ago that flirting between all staff members, men and women, occurs frequently. Lines such as “oh baby oh baby” said with a seductive slur, or “Take me home with you tonight honey” and rumors such as, “Did you hear who hooked up with who?” Now majority of the ppl who work at HD are either in a relationship or married, and still they continue to flirt. So is this harmless flirting? I’m sure not one employee would leave their spouse, parter etc for another employee. Although there have been rumors of affairs between employees, we wont get into that now.

 

So I guess my question is… Do I flirt too much? Dont get me wrong, and I’ve said this plenty of times before, I love Bear to death! I dont know what I would do without him in my life, probably fall apart lol. Anyways, I’ve noticed that we dont flirt dirty any more. As in, “well I already have you, I dont have to work as much with it” I dont feel resented sexually or in any other way, this is just an observation. Back in the day (2007) Bear and I MSN-ed, A LOT. In fact we didn’t exchange numbers until right before we hooked up for the first time. It was all flirting and emailing. I remember raunchy messages and message threads, and going back reading them now all the pet names we used to use for one another.
Exchanges that actually make me blush a little at the memory. So why has this stopped? Or rather simmered down? It’s not like our sex life has changed, if anything it is broader and a little more naughty, having experienced more of one another and we now trust each other more. I find myself making up for the lack of general flirting on my relationship by flirting with some of the guys at work. And honestly I didn’t even notice the work-flirt until a couple of days ago, with a couple of the guys. One guy in particular, who I’ve mentioned before briefly, and didn’t name, flirt a lot actually. And another guy I think has a mini crush on me, which is super cute, has started to flirt too…

Now I’m not vain, but I’m not ugly either, and some days I dress up a little more than others, or apply makeup a little better lol, and mostly its on days Bear is home and I’ll see him, so I wont have to make the extra effort in the parking lot or on my way to Bear’s place. But I’m not sure he notices any more.  And when I try to engage in a dirty flirt, he either doesn’t respond, or its over so quickly I didn’t realize he had said anything.

So going from one of the definitions, I feel most accurately describes what I’ve been doing, from dictionary.com I think I’ll analyse a bit more lol

FLIRT
–verb (used without object)

1. to court trifling or amorously without serious intentions
2. to trifle or toy, as with
So continuing on with this definition in mind, I think I still do this with Bear, but I have more fun doing this with someone else, even a random hot customer, and especially Crimson. She is so much fun to flirt with. If you’re not sure who I’m talking about click here .(She is introduced in the second part of the post) Anyways, Crimson has told me some pretty sexy stories about not only her and her hubby to be, but also previous relationships as well, and needless to say, both genres of stories have of course gotten me hot as fuck. I have already previously expressed that if I were to have a lesbian experience it would be with Crimson.  Anyways, Bear knows of Crimson’s background, and he knows that I flirt with her, and is not annoyed or threatened in any way. Which I’m not sure how I feel about. He knows and I know, I’m a chicken and wouldn’t go through the with lesbian experience. I’m not sure if I should feel good, or not that he hasn’t openly shown any jealousy lol.
Sorry , got off track a bit there.
So yes. I do believe I flirt amorously and without serious intentions as well as toy with the guys at work. I very much enjoy it, and so far I havent had any rejections, but rather introductions to the work-flirt convo lol.
So do you think that I am harmless? Or am I compensating and I should switch to  a sexier, or dirtier flirt with Bear in hopes that he continues? I’m undecided :(
4 Comments leave one →
  1. August 1, 2011 9:45 am

    The type of flirting that you do is harmless and I think healthy. It’s a boost to be noticed in a flirtatious or sexual way. At work, I would be careful. Sure everybody does it but watch that it doesn’t flow into total inappropriateness and the it doesn’t make anyone within earshot uncomfortable, such as other employees and customers. After all, it is a work environment.

    As for flirting with Bear, I’ve experienced this before too. As a relationship grows older the flirting decreases or stops. Well with one bf we kept on with sexy flirting but I think that is because we lived 2 hours from each other and got together on weekends or once a twice a week. Therefore, our connection was in IM-ing, texting, phone calls, which encompasses a lot of continuous flirting.

    Maybe that’s it. The more you see a significant other the less one feels the need to flirt. You are both already together and not trying to build up to anything. Does that make sense?

    I think you (and me too) should begin some purposeful flirting with our guys. Leave some sexy notes in a pocket, send a hot text or erotic photo, you invite Bear to some sexy fun by saying what it is you’d like to do to him. If that ‘act’ never happens who cares, it’s the flirting and teasing that is the object here.

    Now that I think about it, KG still does say some things to me that make me blush. He flirts more than I do, I think he always has.

    Happy flirting!

    -H

    _________________________

    On another subject. How come you don’t allow comments from “Guest” users? In order to comment, I have to sign in with my twitter acct or be logged in as TMI Tuesday Blog and comment under that profile or have a facebook acct (which I don’t have). I would like to be able to comment as me–Hedone from The Pleasure Principle blog at http://pleasure-principle-hedone.blogspot.com

    • August 1, 2011 9:40 pm

      Thanks for your comment Hedone, I always enjoy reading what you have to say. And yes I do understand what you mean when you say that “As a relationship grows older the flirting decreases or stops.” and I agree. I also agree with, “The more you see a significant other the less one feels the need to flirt. You are both already together and not trying to build up to anything. Does that make sense?” Bear works way for a week at a time, and I find it a lot easier to compel a flirty convo with him when he is at work vs. when he is home. And perhaps it is easier to dirty txt and sext that it is to naughty and raunchy flirt in person, depending on who you are ;)
      Actually I sent him a text about 30mins ago, about what I was going to to do him Wednesday night when he got home, needless to say he was completely into what I offered. And also supplied some extra creative foreplay to go along with it.

      Thanks again for the comment :) I look forward to more!!
      xox
      -Goldi

      ______________
      And I’ll have to look into that. Im not sure why my settings are like that… I shall change it asap ;)

  2. August 3, 2011 5:51 pm

    I think to that it is healthy to flirt, it keeps our sex at a higher level, its fun and naughty and makes a body feel hot, as long as you know where your at with your relationship then you are ok. Its part of being human and something we all do even if we do have someone, its a natural occurence, i just love how it makes me feel when someone notices me even with my years of experiece I still feel very sexual, and thats my final say about it. thanks mama Sue

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