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Dom vs. Sub

April 18, 2011

“Cause I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it 
Sex in the air, I don’t care, I love the smell of it 
Sticks and stones may break my bones 
But chains and whips excite me”

So while listening to Rhianna‘s S & M today, it got me thinking, would I be able to do that? Would that turn me on? Well… I think partly it does and the other half, either completely freaks me out or I’m chicken to commit. So lets recap and make sure we are all thinking about the same thing shall we?

The acronym S&M is often used for sadomasochism, which is a form of physical role-playing. Sadomasochism broadly refers to the receiving of pleasure— often sexual— from acts involving the infliction or receiving of pain or humiliation.

          In this respect S & M freaks me out. I don’t think I could do that. Yeah I like to be bit and slapped and occasionally have the hair pulled, but honestly the pain part, its something that turns me on in the slightest. I think by definition I am more into

BDSM is a type of adult roleplay between two or more individuals. The compound acronym, BDSM, is derived from the terms bondage and discipline (B&D),dominance and submission (D&S), and sadism and masochism (S&M).

        But only the bondage part, and the dominance and submission. And I couldn’t be with more than one person at a time. Partly because I’m selfish and couldn’t handle someone else touching Bear, and because I want that one person all to myself (Also I’m pretty sure Bear would go animal on anyone who tried to touch me). When Bear gets rough, I get wet. Plain and simple. Although it excites me I think the dominance also scares me a little, and that is where the thrill comes from. I love to wrestle, and as some point the wrestling always leads to mind-blowing sex (not that this is the only time) ;p

So I mentioned this to Bear, saying how I think I would like to be tied up one day, and I asked him how he felt about that. He replied with, “I think I could tie you up, but would you let me cum in your ass?” Not that I didn’t expect him to be ok with the whole bondage aspect introducing itself into our sex life, but the fact that he obviously had thought about it, and knew exactly what he wanted to do was both exciting and surprising. Bear and I joke all the time about ass fucking and tying each other up and smacking one another around during sex all the time, but I could tell this is something he obviously was thinking about mentioning and wanted to do.

So moving on to the Dom and Sub part of the BDSM relation, I was thinking, I could go either way. As I already mentioned I think it would be hot to be tied up and completely seduced any way he wanted. Not being able to touch, while I am being touched drives me absolutely insane! Although I have a dominant and strong personality and sense of self, I’m not sure if I could be the Dom in the relationship, and not only because I am unsure if I could do the entire deed, or if I would be comfortable putting things into Bear, but I don’t think he could do that lol. Honestly he fits the Dom more perfectly than the Sub. This being said Bear def likes being taken advantage of, so I think he would be open to handcuffs, or tying up. The whips might not be a part of that though because he would hit me twice as hard, not on purpose, but the thrill would be too much, and while I like the idea of getting a little rough I don’t want scares. Also if Bear did accidentally hurt me in a way that left a scare, he would be absolutely horrified. Also with the tying up I don’t like it when he can’t run his fingers through my hair as I suck his cock, or snuggle me when I jack him off… so that kinda leaves those out. Dammit Ive cancelled everything out lol I guess I’ll have to deal with things I can’t do, in order to do the whole act.

Bear goes back to work soon, and I think I might mention the subject again while he is at work, for some reason he is more talkative once he is out in the bush… lol maybe that means I will be able to get more fantasies out of him ;)

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